So Robert and I are getting closer and closer to his R&R dates. For those of you who may not know, R&R is a 15 day break in a deployment where the soldier gets to come home, most people try to put R&R right at the 6 month mark so it evenly breaks up the deployment. Robert and I decided to aim for a later date, at a little over 8 months.
Anyway, we're both extrememly excited to see each other for the first time in 8 months, obviously. However, while I am excited about seeing my husband, I am suffering the stress of making sure these 15 days really count. Just imagine seeing your spouse for 15 days out of the year. Would you want to share them with anyone? No, but you can't be selfish so you have to. What are you going to do for 15 days? It's up to you to figure it out because chances are your soldier just wants to not go on patrols, sleep in a bed, and take a break from giving/taking orders.
I know he'll be happy with whatever we do and I know it'll be perfect because we'll be together, but I can't help but make sure things get done while he's home. You think my face looks like I have chicken pox? No those are just tons of pimples from the stress. You have gift suggestions for Christmas? Well too late, I had to have that all together by last week so I could ship everything home in time for Christmas. You would like to know our schedule while we're home? Yeah, so would I, I'm actively trying not to plan so my husband doesn't feel rushed around. You want to pick him up from the airport? To Bad. Sorry, there's like Army law or something that says all spouses get their soldier for the first 36 hours... at least.
Monday, November 28, 2011
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Our God is good, I can prove it!
This past weekend I had the privilege to spend time with about 50 of my brothers and sisters witnessing God's mercy, grace, and goodness.
The focus of our retreat was Romans 12:1-2:
Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God - this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of you mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is - his good, pleasing and perfect will. (NIV)
A whole weekend devoted to learning about God's mercy, what it means to be a living sacrifice and spiritual transformations. Let me just start out by praising God for having everything come together for the retreat and everyone who had their hands in on it. Before even getting to the retreat God was working in us a message to be shared.
I won't share much from the actual sessions but some of the applications I have for myself coming off the retreat are to:
- cancel cable, DONE
- create a life map
- ask the Holy Spirit to help in keeping God's mercy a focus for me
- follow through on Quiet Time schedule
- figure out where my Time, Money and Strength are going vs. where they should be going
- filter what I allow penetrate my mind.'
There's so much I need to be working on and slowly but surely, with God's grace and mercy, I'll get it.
In Christ,
Julie
The focus of our retreat was Romans 12:1-2:
Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God - this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of you mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is - his good, pleasing and perfect will. (NIV)
A whole weekend devoted to learning about God's mercy, what it means to be a living sacrifice and spiritual transformations. Let me just start out by praising God for having everything come together for the retreat and everyone who had their hands in on it. Before even getting to the retreat God was working in us a message to be shared.
I won't share much from the actual sessions but some of the applications I have for myself coming off the retreat are to:
- cancel cable, DONE
- create a life map
- ask the Holy Spirit to help in keeping God's mercy a focus for me
- follow through on Quiet Time schedule
- figure out where my Time, Money and Strength are going vs. where they should be going
- filter what I allow penetrate my mind.'
There's so much I need to be working on and slowly but surely, with God's grace and mercy, I'll get it.
In Christ,
Julie
Thursday, November 17, 2011
And I thought my chest was small
I'm usually against these types of poems/letters, whatever you want to call them. You know the e-mails you get that claim you'll have an eternity of bad luck unless you forward this to the 3rd, 17th, person in your address book oh and everyone you know with an "e" in their name. Yeah, okay... DELETE.
However, one comes along every so often that I identify with. I really like this one because it doesn't paint the military wife to be a victim like most others do, yes it displays some hardships but the part I most like is the dependant v. independant line. After reading this one I could feel my chest poof up and I have a feeling I'll be walking tall all day.
Lots of moving... Moving... Moving... Moving far from home... Moving two cars, three kids and one dog...all riding with HER of course. Moving sofas to basements because they won't go in THIS house; Moving curtains that won't fit; Moving jobs and certifications and professional development hours. Moving away from friends; Moving toward new friends; Moving her most important luggage: her trunk full of memories.
Often waiting... Waiting... Waiting... Waiting for housing. Waiting for orders. Waiting for deployments. Waiting for phone calls. Waiting for reunions. Waiting for the new curtains to arrive. Waiting for him to come home, For dinner...AGAIN!
They call her 'Military Dependent', but she knows better: She is fiercely In-Dependent.
She can balance a check book; Handle the yard work; Fix a noisy toilet; Bury the family pet...
She is intimately familiar with drywall anchors and toggle bolts. She can file the taxes; Sell a house; Buy a car; Or set up a move...all with ONE Power of Attorney.
She welcomes neighbors that don't welcome her. She reinvents her career with every PCS; Locates a house in the desert, The Arctic, Or the deep south. And learns to call them all 'home'. She MAKES them all home.
Military Wives are somewhat hasty... They leap into: Decorating, Leadership, Volunteering, Career alternatives, Churches, And friendships. They don't have 15 years to get to know people. Their roots are short but flexible. They plant annuals for themselves and perennials for those who come after them.
Military Wives quickly learn to value each other: They connect over coffee, Rely on the spouse network, Accept offers of friendship and favors. Record addresses in pencil...
Military Wives have a common bond: The Military Wife has a husband unlike other husbands; his commitment is unique. He doesn't have a 'JOB' He has a 'MISSION' that he can't just decide to quit... He's on-call for his country 24/7. But for her, he's the most unreliable guy in town! His language is foreign TDY PCS OPR SOS ACC BDU ACU BAR CIB TAD EPR And so, a Military Wife is a translator for her family and his. She is the long- distance link to keep them informed; the glue that holds them together.
A Military Wife has her moments: She wants to wring his neck; Dye his uniform pink; Refuse to move to Siberia; But she pulls herself together. Give her a few days, A travel brochure, A long hot bath, A pledge to the flag, A wedding picture, And she goes. She packs. She moves. She follows.
Why? What for? How come? You may think it is because she has lost her mind. But actually it is because she has lost her heart. It was stolen from her by a man, Who puts duty first, Who longs to deploy, Who salutes the flag, And whose boots in the doorway remind her that as long as he is her Military Husband, She will remain his military wife. And would have it no other way.
I promise this will be the last one of these military letters. I'm just so darn proud I can't help it!
However, one comes along every so often that I identify with. I really like this one because it doesn't paint the military wife to be a victim like most others do, yes it displays some hardships but the part I most like is the dependant v. independant line. After reading this one I could feel my chest poof up and I have a feeling I'll be walking tall all day.
Lots of moving... Moving... Moving... Moving far from home... Moving two cars, three kids and one dog...all riding with HER of course. Moving sofas to basements because they won't go in THIS house; Moving curtains that won't fit; Moving jobs and certifications and professional development hours. Moving away from friends; Moving toward new friends; Moving her most important luggage: her trunk full of memories.
Often waiting... Waiting... Waiting... Waiting for housing. Waiting for orders. Waiting for deployments. Waiting for phone calls. Waiting for reunions. Waiting for the new curtains to arrive. Waiting for him to come home, For dinner...AGAIN!
They call her 'Military Dependent', but she knows better: She is fiercely In-Dependent.
She can balance a check book; Handle the yard work; Fix a noisy toilet; Bury the family pet...
She is intimately familiar with drywall anchors and toggle bolts. She can file the taxes; Sell a house; Buy a car; Or set up a move...all with ONE Power of Attorney.
She welcomes neighbors that don't welcome her. She reinvents her career with every PCS; Locates a house in the desert, The Arctic, Or the deep south. And learns to call them all 'home'. She MAKES them all home.
Military Wives are somewhat hasty... They leap into: Decorating, Leadership, Volunteering, Career alternatives, Churches, And friendships. They don't have 15 years to get to know people. Their roots are short but flexible. They plant annuals for themselves and perennials for those who come after them.
Military Wives quickly learn to value each other: They connect over coffee, Rely on the spouse network, Accept offers of friendship and favors. Record addresses in pencil...
Military Wives have a common bond: The Military Wife has a husband unlike other husbands; his commitment is unique. He doesn't have a 'JOB' He has a 'MISSION' that he can't just decide to quit... He's on-call for his country 24/7. But for her, he's the most unreliable guy in town! His language is foreign TDY PCS OPR SOS ACC BDU ACU BAR CIB TAD EPR And so, a Military Wife is a translator for her family and his. She is the long- distance link to keep them informed; the glue that holds them together.
A Military Wife has her moments: She wants to wring his neck; Dye his uniform pink; Refuse to move to Siberia; But she pulls herself together. Give her a few days, A travel brochure, A long hot bath, A pledge to the flag, A wedding picture, And she goes. She packs. She moves. She follows.
Why? What for? How come? You may think it is because she has lost her mind. But actually it is because she has lost her heart. It was stolen from her by a man, Who puts duty first, Who longs to deploy, Who salutes the flag, And whose boots in the doorway remind her that as long as he is her Military Husband, She will remain his military wife. And would have it no other way.
I promise this will be the last one of these military letters. I'm just so darn proud I can't help it!
Thursday, October 27, 2011
So says the soldier
So going along the lines of the last few posts, here's something I found that describes things pretty well. This one comes from the soldier's point of view... I'll have to ask Robert if he agrees at all.
Military Man's Promise:
I cannot promise you every night of my life. I cannot promise to be beside you for every difficult moment, every trial, and every hardship. In truth, I can promise you that I will not be with you for most. I will leave you at inconvenient times. Any special date to us may be tainted with the anniversary of the death of one of my friends. I will ask you to take over whatever life we have built together for months and years at a time. And I will then crash back into that life that you have used your sweat, your tears and your heartache to keep together, and try to take it back as I knew it before.
I will shut you out at times because it will be the best way for me to hold it together at that moment. I will lie to you. I will tell you I don't know things when I do. I will not always tell you where I am going, when I will be back, or who I am with. I may not call you for weeks and months and you will not be able to call me. You will ask questions that I won't answer. You will know answers to questions that you will hope you never need.
I will share things with my brothers that you will never understand. They will know things about me that you never will. They will be a support to me in some things that you cannot be. I will miss birthdays. I will miss anniversaries. I may need time to process things that seem natural to everyone else.
It will seem that someone - or something - will always take precedence over you.
I will uproot you and ask you to re-establish our family anywhere in the world, in any season, at any time - over and over again. Sand and mud will be tracked through your halls from the boots I am too tired to take off.
I will leave you when you beg me not to. I will stand at attention while you cry beside me. I will not turn my head and I will walk away. I will knowingly break your heart. And I will do it again - and again. I cannot promise you all of me. I cannot promise you much of anything.
But if you will have me, I can promise that as I march away from you, it is not without sharing your heartache. I promise you that every time I break your heart I will be breaking mine. Every time that I cannot answer you I will be protecting you. Whenever you want to call and you have no number to dial, I will be wanting to do the same. I will protect everything that we have created together with every fiber of my being while you do the same back at home. I will honor you in everything - every moment that we are apart and every moment that I am with you. I will fight harder and push further knowing that I do so for you. And I will carry you with me in everything, until my sandy boots once again sit just inside our door.
I cannot promise you every night of my life. I cannot promise to be beside you for every difficult moment, every trial, and every hardship. In truth, I can promise you that I will not be with you for most. I will leave you at inconvenient times. Any special date to us may be tainted with the anniversary of the death of one of my friends. I will ask you to take over whatever life we have built together for months and years at a time. And I will then crash back into that life that you have used your sweat, your tears and your heartache to keep together, and try to take it back as I knew it before.
I will shut you out at times because it will be the best way for me to hold it together at that moment. I will lie to you. I will tell you I don't know things when I do. I will not always tell you where I am going, when I will be back, or who I am with. I may not call you for weeks and months and you will not be able to call me. You will ask questions that I won't answer. You will know answers to questions that you will hope you never need.
I will share things with my brothers that you will never understand. They will know things about me that you never will. They will be a support to me in some things that you cannot be. I will miss birthdays. I will miss anniversaries. I may need time to process things that seem natural to everyone else.
It will seem that someone - or something - will always take precedence over you.
I will uproot you and ask you to re-establish our family anywhere in the world, in any season, at any time - over and over again. Sand and mud will be tracked through your halls from the boots I am too tired to take off.
I will leave you when you beg me not to. I will stand at attention while you cry beside me. I will not turn my head and I will walk away. I will knowingly break your heart. And I will do it again - and again. I cannot promise you all of me. I cannot promise you much of anything.
But if you will have me, I can promise that as I march away from you, it is not without sharing your heartache. I promise you that every time I break your heart I will be breaking mine. Every time that I cannot answer you I will be protecting you. Whenever you want to call and you have no number to dial, I will be wanting to do the same. I will protect everything that we have created together with every fiber of my being while you do the same back at home. I will honor you in everything - every moment that we are apart and every moment that I am with you. I will fight harder and push further knowing that I do so for you. And I will carry you with me in everything, until my sandy boots once again sit just inside our door.
Reading that, some of you might say that's a terrible relationship/marriage but I also know that many of you finished reading and all you remember is the last paragraph. In the end he makes it all worth it.
Sunday, October 23, 2011
You're thankful for WHAT?!
It's a little early for the holiday but I had a {Fall Party} last night and it got me in the mood. God has blessed me in numerous ways, I can't even list everything. Piggy backing off of my last post I'm going to share, with those of you who are curious, why I am thankful for a year long deployment.
- Gain a greater reliance on God.
Robert is litterally half a world away, talk about feeling out of control, I know know I have no control it is God who is going to rule over Robert's and my life.
- Lots of girl time.
From movie nights, to bead parties, birthday celebrations, to holidays, these women become a part of my family and I love them as sisters.
- Sleeping spread eagle.
Yeah, a queen size bed all to myself to sleep in whichever direction or shape my heart/dreams desire.
- Crunchy Peanut Butter.
You heard me, Robert prefers creamy to crunchy while it's not a big deal to me I get to have a year of crunchy peanut butter.
- Finding new ways to love each other.
A kiss isn't possible, an I love you is but most of the time the expression feels like it falls short of the feelings. We get to find new ways to show each other we love them, ways we wouldn't bother with otherwise.
- Writing letters.
Truly a lost art. I can only speak for myself but when I go to my mailbox and recoognize Robert's handwriting among bills and all the credit card applications my heart flips, spins, and jumps.
- Domestic duties.
I continue to do them just not as often... The chili I made Wednesday lasts me until Saturday, I have enough clothes to make it 2 weeks without even looking at the laundry, dishes last longer, dusting and vacuuming are at a minimum, and I love it!
- I gain a greater appreciation for all that Robert does.
Robert's the cook in our family, already there are nights when I'm rockin' the PB&J meals, and for the record cereal IS acceptable for dinner. Changing the oil, mowing the yard, things like that.
- Missing his smile.
Yeah weird right, I am thankful for missing my husband's smile. Only because when I picture it in my head I feel so much joy and love, and those are definitely things to be thankful for.
- No arguing.
By the time I get that phone call I can't be anything but happy. Robert and I haven't argued for 6 and a half months which is way longer than most civilian married couples.
Be thankful. For every morning you wake up beside them, for every "I love you," for every time they offer to drive, for every meal ready to eat when you get home, for the things they do but don't have to, for the smile they bring to your face, for the flips, spins, and jumps they give your heart. Be thankful.
- Gain a greater reliance on God.
Robert is litterally half a world away, talk about feeling out of control, I know know I have no control it is God who is going to rule over Robert's and my life.
- Lots of girl time.
From movie nights, to bead parties, birthday celebrations, to holidays, these women become a part of my family and I love them as sisters.
- Sleeping spread eagle.
Yeah, a queen size bed all to myself to sleep in whichever direction or shape my heart/dreams desire.
- Crunchy Peanut Butter.
You heard me, Robert prefers creamy to crunchy while it's not a big deal to me I get to have a year of crunchy peanut butter.
- Finding new ways to love each other.
A kiss isn't possible, an I love you is but most of the time the expression feels like it falls short of the feelings. We get to find new ways to show each other we love them, ways we wouldn't bother with otherwise.
- Writing letters.
Truly a lost art. I can only speak for myself but when I go to my mailbox and recoognize Robert's handwriting among bills and all the credit card applications my heart flips, spins, and jumps.
- Domestic duties.
I continue to do them just not as often... The chili I made Wednesday lasts me until Saturday, I have enough clothes to make it 2 weeks without even looking at the laundry, dishes last longer, dusting and vacuuming are at a minimum, and I love it!
- I gain a greater appreciation for all that Robert does.
Robert's the cook in our family, already there are nights when I'm rockin' the PB&J meals, and for the record cereal IS acceptable for dinner. Changing the oil, mowing the yard, things like that.
- Missing his smile.
Yeah weird right, I am thankful for missing my husband's smile. Only because when I picture it in my head I feel so much joy and love, and those are definitely things to be thankful for.
- No arguing.
By the time I get that phone call I can't be anything but happy. Robert and I haven't argued for 6 and a half months which is way longer than most civilian married couples.
Be thankful. For every morning you wake up beside them, for every "I love you," for every time they offer to drive, for every meal ready to eat when you get home, for the things they do but don't have to, for the smile they bring to your face, for the flips, spins, and jumps they give your heart. Be thankful.
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